Play by Play Day by Day with Amy Lawrence

“Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue.” 💙💙

When it was finally my turn to walk down the aisle last winter, that timeless advice for brides resonated with me. As much joy and excitement surrounded our December date, there were unmistakable holes in my heart, almost like voids. How I wished I could have shared that day with my grandmothers, Mary Elizabeth and Helen Eugenia Genevieve. I decided to use that old English poem with its four elements to honor them and take them with me on wedding day.

It’s hard to comprehend that we said farewell to Grammy Helen more than two years ago. In some ways, it feels like yesterday that I spoke to her; in other ways, it feels like forever. So much of my life has changed since the summer of 2022. Meeting my future husband, getting to know him long distance, accepting his proposal, planning our wedding weekend, celebrating with family and friends, moving him from Texas, starting our life together–the last two years have been sweet and memorable with countless prayers answered. Of course, I wouldn’t change the events, but I still miss Grammy with my whole heart. How much I wanted to see and hear her joy after all the times she told me I “better hurry up” and get married, ha.

My cherished childhood memories of summertime revolve around traveling to visit my grandparents in northeast Ohio and central Wisconsin. I vividly remember family get-togethers, cookouts and other big meals, games in their backyards, late nights with cousins, laughter and lots of joy. July was the month we celebrated the wedding anniversary of my maternal Grandma and Grandpa. One of my favorite days ever was centered around the large outdoor party Mom threw for their 50th.❤️

My grandmothers were my biggest champions, and I loved making them proud. I am incredibly grateful they lived to 91 and 100 which allowed us precious extra time with them. What a wonderful experience it would have been to share the plans, the ring, the flowers, the dresses, the nerves, the emotions and the joy. They would have been very special guests with places of honor (and so many photos). Instead, I carried them with me in a different way.

Except for my engagement ring, all of the jewelry I wore on wedding day came from my grandmothers. When my mom’s mom passed away the week after 9/11, she wore only her wedding ring from 1930. My mother let me keep it after her funeral, and I very rarely take it off. For more than two decades, I’ve had the delicate, thin platinum band on my right ring finger. It’s been with me everywhere except Africa; Mom made me leave it behind because she didn’t want me to lose it. Something old.🤍

In 2020, when I bought my house, the fam arrived (like the cavalry) to help me unpack and Mom brought a surprise: Gram’s ring that was a gift from my grandfather. I cherish both pieces and wore them together on my right hand when I walked down the aisle. I also wore a pair of her silver studs as my second earrings, something borrowed from Mom’s jewelry box on wedding weekend.

My paternal grandmother preferred costume jewelry in BRIGHT colors like blazing yellow, hot pink and vibrant turquoise. Grammy Helen was almost always dressed in rich and flamboyant shades! (I’m fairly certain she passed her love for radiant colors onto me.) When she died, my uncle let me go through her jewelry and choose a few pieces. Of course, I grabbed some loud chunky necklaces and Christmas pins. I also found a pair of silver hoop drop earrings with black etchings. I’d never seen them before, and I wondered if they were a gift for a special occasion. I wear them all the time now, and they were perfect for my wedding dress.

Just one more piece of jewelry was necessary: a necklace. For Grammy’s 100th birthday, my brother’s family gave her a delicate silver chain with a petite sapphire pendant and matching earrings. I helped her put them on that evening–April 6th, 2022. In the days that followed, she wore them proudly. The last time I saw her in person, she was wearing them. After she died, I found the necklace among her belongings. When I told Matthew, he said I should keep it. Something blue.💙💔

My grandmas were a tag-team when it came to flowers. I was ALWAYS going to adore bright blooms because flowers made each of them so happy. They cultivated plants and pots of all shades and sizes during the growing months; they could sit and watch their flowers and find great contentment and peace. The last few years with Grammy Helen, I was forever sharing photos of the various flowers in my own yard. My something new for the wedding might have been their favorite element: a bouquet of deep purple flowers with ivory and silver accents. I would have made sure they had special bouquets to carry, too.

The first nine months of marriage have flown by in a blur! When people ask me what married life is like, I am honest. It’s challenging. And the transition was HARD! I will readily admit I was naive about the adjustment after years of living alone, ha. I would have called my grandmothers dozens of time for their counsel and to ask for their wisdom; they would have given it to me without sugar-coating. Both were fairly blunt (another way I take after them). On those days when I’ve wondered if I was the worst wife in the world, they would have listened, shared a few stories of their own and told me to buck up! And we would have laughed. They were always laughing, just one more way I am like my Grandma Mary and Grammy Helen.

Both my grandmothers could dance! What sweet moments we would have enjoyed on the dance floor with our families all around. When we are finally together again in heaven, I will dance with each of them and tell them how I honored them and kept them close on wedding day. And I will thank them in person for the years and years of prayers answered on December 17, 2023.💜

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